A commenter, Penny, recently asked me this:
I have a question for you, as a spiritual person, I find it is often difficult in circle of friends that do not share the same values with you. How do you deal with this within your band? Do they share your sentiments and faith? I am apart of a little garage band..but my band mates are not so supportive.
The reason I bring this up is because I’m asked this quite a bit so I thought I’d try to respond. What Penny describes is not at all uncommon. People of faith all over the world find themselves in work related or social environments where those around them don’t share their faith or their values. So my situation as the sole Christian in a group of four partners is nothing unique.
For some reason I’ve never been burden by the tension that I am the only Christian in the band. I think that is largely due to the fact that my band mates are extremely gracious individuals. They don’t feel the need to change me and I don’t feel the need to change their minds in order to validate my own perspective. On the contrary, I’ve been massively influenced by the harmony we’ve achieved as a band for the past 16 years and that has less to do with me and much more to do with my band mates. I’ve learned a lot about community and coexistence from them and that is ultimately their gift to me, not the other way around. They may have been positively influenced by me at times, but I don’t think it’s best for me to approach my relationships with the assumption that I have some kind of nugget of wisdom that they need in order to be more full human beings. I just don’t believe that. If I were to operate with that assumption, then I wouldn’t blame them for not being supportive and soured by my holier-than-thou posture. But who knows, maybe some of them will read this and let me know I’m full of shit. haha.